Almost exactly a month ago today I pronounced to the world that Spain would win the World Cup in South Africa, and today, in spite of facing a very talented Dutch team I'm sticking by my pick. Am I an expert bracketologist...no, sadly. However i do know a little about soccer and have gotten very lucky thusfar, so let me tell you why the team i picked is gonna make me right tomorrow.
Spain has come this far by playing some of the most impressive, and drably bland soccer you will ever see. A strict possession team Spain uses creative passing in order to freely move the ball around the field and control it for exorbent amounts of time (in lamens terms). If you are into soccer this is an exhilarating and impressive feat that proves fun to watch and dissect. However if you are the casual world cup fan this is about as fun as watching Tom Brady kneel 4 times at the end of a Pats-Bills game.
Basically if Spain scores first you are completely and utterly fucked. The rest of the game is essentially them kneeling out the clock as long spans of possession and creative movement off the ball gives the other time little chance to touch the ball let alone score. In the rare event that the other team can get the ball Spain's staunch defense gets it back 9/10 times and on that rare occasion they falter Iker Cassilas saves 9/10 shots. Spain has won many of its games 1-0, including four straight clean sheets for Cassilas and its a trend they look to continue. Not that Spain is incapable of having multi-goal games, they certainly have the firepower with golden boot contender David Villa and Liverpool standout Fernando Torres. Its just that once Spain takes their humble one goal lead, they are content to possess the rest of the game and make victory all but a certainty. In other words if Spain scores in the fiftieth minute, expect to see their opponents bleed out for the next 40 mins plus stoppage time.
If the Netherlands are to score first, which is also a true possibility with another potential Golden Boot winner Wesley Sneijder, Robin Van Persie, Dirk Kuyt, and Arjen Robben on attack. Note that I said possibility, because as stated earlier Spain's defense is more relentless and annoying than a busty Evangelical girl that wants to wait for marriage. NOT EVEN A HANDJOB!!!? Its not like your future retard husband needs your hands to be pure as well!!! They don't have palm hymens for a reason: every girl that swung a baseball bat would be labeled a handy whore!!! But, I (slightly) digress, if Spain scores first this game is as good as over. I do not foresee it going to extra time (unless scoreless) and unless the Dutch find a way to score first and contain Xavi's spectacular passing regimen, expect Spain to come off the pitch holding the hardware in sexy fashion. Prediction: Spain starts out with Villa up top, subs in Torres between the 60 and 70th minute, Torres/Villa scores between the 60-80th minute, and Spain's passing attack lets the Dutch bleed out slowly and painfully in a boring 1-nil victory. Viva Espana, and Congrats Germany for taking the little coveted third place victory.
